Love that started online - Part 5

Finally it’s 12 p.m., excited as I was, logged on the net, yet there was still no sign of FlyNDance. But there's a mail from her:

Dear Slorr,
At first I thought it will be easier for me to settle down in the darkness.. recollecting memories we have shared... but all I felt was loneliness..... Can you feel it too?... I still can't change the habit of logging on at 1am... so I used a different nick to sneak into AJCRR... you don't blame me right?...:P... you weren’t there... should I feel glad for your obedience?....

You said both of us belonged to TYPE 2... the foolish type...maybe you are right!... 'COs I really do admire those who dares to fight for their desires... I stroke my hair gently when you said that I am leaving the world... and a few strands of hair fell..... No!... doctor told me its not a terminal disease... and doctor aren't supposed to lie!!?... I still can live like a normal person... BUT CAN I ?

FlyNDance... is it really something I wont be able to do?... After the first meeting with you at Mac... I started to realize that you are not only a virtual being living in the cyberspace... in reality you are strong, gentle and sensitive.... I can feel the defense Wall of my heart is slowly breaking apart.... I am defeated... I tied my hair today.. 'cos my fren told me that I look more attractive this way...

I want you to remember my face as it is today... 'cos after today... everything may change.... But why didn't you ask for my real name? ..that’s why I never asked for urs... I am a girl mah..:P... do you realized how I wish to have something more than a nick to take along with me? ...Slorr... thank you for the DOLCE VITA. Finally got a taste of what sweet times are like... but I am really sorry. ??.I just couldn’t bear to say goodbye.....

Since it started from a mail.... it should end with a mail too.... Its been 3 months and 2 days since the very first mail... not a very long time but it isn't short either.... our story began from me... and I will end it. Maybe its what you said... 'Internet is fast and convenient, but it isn't perfect'.... I can send you my thoughts right away... but not my tears... It’s about 5.30am now.... time to go.... by the time you receive this mail... I would be trying to settle down somewhere else.... I don't know....

Good Bye

With lotsa love,
FlyNDance

After reading her mail, I felt as if I had just experienced a roller-coaster ride which almost derailed. She had shown me the other side of her, soft and sensitive. For a couple of months, I was trying to hypnotizes myself, to suppress my feelings whenever I started to think about her again. Perpetually I was telling myself, she is just one virtual character that fly and dance in the net, but never in the real world.

I became a fugitive, escaping from my PC, escaping from the Internet and anything that has to do with coffee. Hide myself behind the piles of lecture notes, behind the crowd of people, trying to get rid of this thought of missing something in life. But I failed. I found out that its not that I don't miss her, its just that I had forgotten the passion that always comes along when you are having something hanging on your mind all the time.

Its like I cannot breathe, it’s just that I had forgotten the fact that I have been breathing in and out for the past 19 years. I can hold my breath for a while, but not forever. I have to find her!

"Err... I am looking for ... er..FlyNDance...."
"HUH??..."

'Huh', this is the exact word I was expecting from her. She seems to be FlyNDance's elder sister, 20++, looked quite a beauty too even without any makeup. But of course, still can't be compared with her. I explained to her my purpose for knocking on the door and told her that I am no stalker whom she might think I am.

Surprisingly when I told her my disgusting nick, Slorr, she appeared to be rather excited and quickly she scribbled something on a small piece of paper and handed it to me.

"You should go and see her. SGH, Room 3-425."