Love that started online - Part 2

Before I can get over the surprise and the daze, she sent me a message.

"Hey Slorr, so late liao haven't sleep ah?"

Now what? Now what? Ok ok, I had to calm down first. I swallowed hard on my saliva, took a few deep breath. Now where is that Tye when I needed him most at such crucial moment, somebody to tell me what to say to her. How am I going to attract her with my pathetic humor, which has gone stale.

"Slorr, me in a foul mood today. Can't sleep, you leh?"

MOTHER'S (direct translation to Chinese), what Slorr Slorr... Now when I read it twice in a row, I am beginning to feel disgusted in that nick Tye gave me. Tye said that: "Who knows, it might attract some innocent gals in talking to you."

"I am not feeling very good too. So let's sad together."

Finally squeezed a sentence out, but I can already feel droplets of sweat forming on my forehead. Actually I am not in a bad mood, I just wanna follow up her topic that's all. And if she ask for the reason for my feeling down, I can say:

"Since you are feeling down, how can I ever be happy?"

I know it sounds mushy, but Tye said: "MUSHINESS IS THE FUNDAMENTAL TO ALL COURTSHIP." And gals are a very weird species, they trust their ears far more than their eyes. So instead of doing 10 things to impress her, why not just say a sentence to move her.

"Ok, but you haven't greet me leh."

DAMNIT!.. how can I forget simple manners to gals. To think they call me MR COURTEOUS' in school. If this thing ever leaks out in school, I would lose all my female fans.

"Nice to meet you, miss long-hair."
"I've been wishing that she's keeping long hair.

Tye said that: "FlyNDance... hmm.. she would either be long-haired or a desperado, 'COs when gals dance, only 2 parts of them may fly: hair and skirt. So if she doesn’t has long hair, that means her skirt flies when she dances, AH-HA!!.. this has a certain sexual hint in it...haha.."

"Eh? How you know I got long hair?"

BINGO! Heaven is on my side this time. It goes to prove that she is not a DESPERADO. Yes!

"Not only that, I also know you seldom wear skirt."

I increased the stake, if I am correct this time, peace on earth forever.

"Err... I guess you are right lor. But how you know one?"
"Just guess."
"Ok lor. Hey Slorr, tell you what, me tired liao, you coming online tomorrow morning?"
"Ya, why??"
"Please please please say the you coming too, if not I am going to kill myself for letting you go tonight. I'll see ya tomorrow at 10 am then. Good night."
"Er.. should be today at 10 am.. ok.. good night too."

I just blurted out a last sentence ....Offline. Suddenly I was so impressed by my performance just now. But is the season of spring really arriving for me?? I wish...............

"Slorr, what a coincidence ahh"
"Yeh, I am not late."
"Ya lor, so qiao."

Girls are weird, I thought we already had an arrangement, why do I have to pretend that its not. They must have watched too many movies, and like to think that guys they met due to the thing called 'fate' is the best thing that can happen to their love life.

"Slorr, you talking nonsense lah."
"NONSENSE? Ok, let me tell you what is nonsense. Summer's beach, the guy must be good at running, with broad shoulders, dark complexion with a tint of redness, sparkling eyes and loud laughter. Then he will call out loud the name of the girl, running towards her, carry her and spin 3 rounds anticlockwisely."
"Slorr, you siao liaoz ahh?"
"I siao? Ok, let's change a location then. Deep in the mountains, the guy must have long hair, gotta have the look of an artist, carries a sketching stand, a few pieces of drawings, and you can see birds stop over at his side admiring his work. And there will be a girl whose the model, most probably naked."
"Slorr, but these all very romantic mah."
"ROMANTIC? Hello miss, romance only survive in novels and movies.

In real life, the guy on the beach may step onto broken glass or the girl may be too heavy which tore his arm muscles. Birds may just clear their waste on top of the guy in the mountains, or he might get a thrashing from the girl because he comments on the excess fats around the waist and hips."

"Slorr, you hate romance?"
"I hate romance? Nope, I am just using my knowledge of statistics to get a deduction, that guys must be TALL to be romantic, not HANDSOME!!! Some love novels even portrayed the guy as normal looking, but no-one dares to challenge the height of him! I object, because I am not tall."
"?Slorr.... objection overruled..."

I think I am really outstandingly bo liao, talking to her about these until noon.

"Slorr, are you hungry?"
"Ya, you leh?"
"Yes, guess its time for lunch...Slorr.."
"Then do you think we should?"
"Slorr, I am just asking. I don't intend to have lunch with you."
"Ok, good. I am not romantic, neither are you."